Authenticity

Dear Corporate Friend,

Personal branding is one of nowadays most hip buzz words. I’ve heard a ton of definitions about it and even more tips and tricks on how to build it, create it, maintain it, improve it.

So today I want to take a bold step and dispute it! Or at least a dimension of it. Allow me to elaborate: we are told we need to have a personal brand or that we have a personal brand regardless if we’ve spent time working on it or not.

They say a person never remembers what you said or did but always remembers how you made them feel and I think this is the perfect way to underline my point: the gap between what some people would like their personal brand to be and what their authentic self is.

It might seem unimportant or unclear but it’s exactly the „what you say” vs the „how you make someone feel”.

So let’s give a few examples here:

The lazy employee

How many of us ever worked with a colleague that we thought was lazy? All, I’m sure. How come, more often than not, these are exactly the candidates that best introduce themselves at interviews? The ones that surprise you and make you want to rush the offer to their table only to discover, soon enough, that it’s not all rainbows and sunsets.

Quickly (but usually after the probation period), the lazy employee becomes a detractor and all his colleagues have to fill in the blanks while, at the same time, becoming increasingly frustrated. So, what could be a personal brand here? I’m betting that this person would say one of their flaws is being a perfectionist. If only we had a penny for all the moments we heard this in an interview...

The superficial manager

The story is: „I am in this role because I care about people and I want to be here for my team and help them grow”. So here we have the personal branding; the „what you say”. The sad reality is different. Usually couldn’t be further away.

Who is the story created for? Is it really something they truly believe or is it just completely made up because they know this story sells? I mean… how could a manager get a job saying „I really couldn’t care less about the team, they’re not my friends, they’re here now and tomorrow they’re gone. What I do care about is my personal development, my salary, my vacations, my promotions”. They would probably be jobless.

The technically challenged

They would like to be an expert. They’re probably also a manager. They praise themselves often (maybe because nobody else does?). They somehow get the attention. God forbid they actually have to do something at a certain point because that’s when they’ll have to engage their talent (hopefully they have it) of shifting the focus to something else in order to make everyone lose sight of what they were supposed to do and hopefully never have to revisit the conversation again. So that’s the personal branding. Now the gap leads us to many evasive ways to „get away with it”. That can be: passing the task to someone else who will do it for them; procrastinating to infinity; faking it or simply laying low like an ostrich and hoping nobody will follow up.

As these are merely figments of my imagination, please take this with a grain of salt. They are...or can be...some examples of the gap.

Now, you might think „Hey, but isn’t everyone supposed to improve themselves and work towards their ideal?”. And you would be right. Of course we should all do this but is this really the case?

Is that lazy employee really wanting to be a top-notch performer? Is that superficial manager really wanting to care about others and help them grow? Is that sub-par guy really wanting to become an expert?

Or is it just a nicer story to share? You know what would actually be a better story to tell?

The TRUTH! Yes, I know, shocker...

What does this mean? Of course, nobody will ever disclose in a million years their flaws and I’m not saying they should. That’s a conservation mechanism and it’s great, it helps us survive. What we should do, instead, is focus on the RIGHT thing as opposed to what we believe we should be focusing on. In a world of diversity and inclusion, why do so many people try to stay in line and fit within the same box?

The lazy employee might be a great creator. Maybe they’re very talented and creative. So don’t try to sell yourself as the hardest worker because we know you’re not. Instead, focus on what you really have: your creativity.

The superficial manager might be a great technical expert. So focus on that! Tell us how awesome you are at hitting goals and what metric systems have you implemented. Show us that cool power point presentation that you know you want to show!

Ok so now you see where I’m going with this...

These are examples of what your personal brand should really be about: the real you. When you genuinely care about something, it will make you shine. It will make all of us feel comfortable around you and support you more. Want to really become the caring manager or the savvy expert? Cool! Do that first and THEN include it in your personal brand.

For me, authenticity is such a crucial aspect but never discussed when, in reality, it should be the focus. It will bring trust. It will forge real relationships. It will show the real you and allow all of us to decide where we want to position ourselves in relation to you. I know I, for one, have suffered many times when interacting with this gap in people but one thing is for sure: sooner or later everyone will feel it.

If you feel you are in such a situation, don’t worry. I am certain that if you close „the gap” you will get so many good things flowing into your life. I hope this brings many of us to a point of introspection so that we can be honest with ourselves and start working on our personal brand the right way; no gaps, no loose ends.

If you are not, then THANK YOU for making this a better world to live in!

From my cubicle to yours,

The D.